Best copywriting examples for hotel websites to learn from
Croatian hotel websites losing obviously because of bad English
I’ve been posting slides on Linkedin on which I regularly put copies of hotels who do their copywriting right.
Apart from the great examples, there are also those which are blatantly wrong, incorrect and mostly with bad English grammar.
As copywriters, we should stay away from bad English grammar.
That in the first place.
Because if the reader gets wind of it, then your hotel might lose face.
Any website for a Croatian hotel or accommodation must be “clean” in that regard. Clean from mistakes in English grammar, bad sentence structure or word order.
Look below, for example:
I’ve put together a 10 page presentation document on the most common mistakes in English grammar and word order of Croatian websites which have English translations
How can non-English websites still do a great job with copywriting
For starters, it’s important to bring into awareness that hotel websites can’t be convincing and efficient, if their English isn’t satisfactory.
This means
1-hiring an English copywriter, a native English speaker at best, who has been engaged in creating copy for hotels.
Such a copy for hotels, which also makes use of a video as a storytelling method.
or
2 -investing in a Croatian copywriter, who has mastered the English language well enough.
Such a hotel website copywriter writing in English won’t sound non-English right in the first few sentences.
and
3 - learning from the very best on the internet: in style, tone, images, who come up with interesting checked facts, tell stories of guests and share insights on what they found compelling about staying in a particular hotel.
There' s nothing more annoying for me than to open a hotel website and see right away a mistake staring you in the face.
It’s obvious, the hotel website owner didn’t hire a website copywriter with solid English.
Copywriting examples in the travel industry with either incorrect or bad English
But how do you know when the hotel website is not created by an copywriter with good English?
It’s simple.
Just look at this example:
EXAMPLE - a luxury villa in Gorski Kotar - BAD WORD ORDER
The above text describes the position of the villa (let’s imagine it being a hotel).
See the wrong word order here?
An English copywriter versed in English will not do such a mistake. Obviously, because one of the first rules any student of English will have to learn is that the English language has a set word order, when creating a sentence.
The so-called SVO structure, which guarantees basic and solid English copywriting.
This structure not only aids you in creating correct English sentences, it also helps copywriters put together stronger sentences.
Weak: If Amendment X passes it could lead to bad things for our families.
Strong: Amendment X destroys families.
A Croatian website inviting you for a cruise with bad English in the CTA section (the button)
Or this example- incorrect English can be seen on the button, too (the CTA element of a website).
It says “book yacht”.
Anyone fairly good at English would say: BOOK A YACHT” (for any kind of yacht) or BOOK THE YACHT, if it’s a definite yacht.
But, what’s more appalling is, that this example showcases an incorrect fact included into copywriting.
Croatia has an ocean?
In which world or life?
The copywriter here obviously didn’t do his homework well.
Research, research, research, until you know that the fact you want to add is a proven one.
Now look at how your hotel website should look like.
Take it in as a role model.
A role model, because the site has a remarkable video playing right when you open the website.
Best hotel website copywriting example with video (my opinion)
2. EXAMPLE - a hotel in Dubrovnik written by a true English copywriter
This next website has been written by an English copywriter. No doubt about that.
Although the hotel is in Dubrovnik, not somewhere in England.
Look at the beginning of this segment:
The sentence structure right, tone of voice all right, adequate vocabulary, nice images, hypothetical situations, inviting scenes…
Wouldn’t you want to sound like that?